This Friday, May 7th, Hill Hall will be hosting an event of epic proportions. That's right, it's time for 70's skate. If you enjoy making a complete idiot out of yourself, and you don't mind pushing Satanist propoganda, come to the Hill Hall lounge at 7:30pm. Oh, wait... you didn't know that 70's skate was all about Satanism? Ooo... Poor unfortunate soul. We will enlighten you.

     70's Skate was founded in 1903 under the name "Satan is Great" by a group of students who were disgruntled by the failure of the world to come to an end in the year 1900. In the year 1899, much of the world was under the impression that the world would end in the year 1900. This "Y1.9K" hype spread even to the then small SPU campus. Bill Keaton, president of SPU in 1899 was quoted as saying "God works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base-ten counting system, and likes round numbers." However, the year 1900 came and went, and the world continued on. As a result, many cults began to form, praising Satan for the survival of the world. These cultists belived that Satan had benevolently fought Jesus in heaven's small claims court in order to prevent the end of the world.

     As the years progressed, "Satan is Great" began to lose it's witty sound, and instead became seen in the eyes of the campus as a radical hate group that met once a year and tried to sing ancient Hindu choruses. Therefore, as the roaring 20's rolled around, the secret society changed it's name to the Flagpole Sittas. Well, soon this name also fell out of style, and they changed over to "Gilligan's Islanders." This was the name the group was known as for 10 years, until they suddenly disappeared in the late 60's.

     However, although they vanished from sight, they still held monthly meetings, and discussed how they might bring themselves back to the ways of their predecessors. After 15 years of deliberation, they decided that the culture of the 70's would be the perfect ruse. They could blatently endorse drugs, frilly hair, bad tastes in clothing, and generally anything evil, plus as an added bonus, they could take the name "Seventies Skate," which bears much resemblance to the original title of the group: "Satan is Great."

     So, just keep in mind the history of this "social event" as you help the Satanists in their hellish crusade of promoting their agenda as socially acceptable to the students of SPU.

      Skor