What new sport has become the rave around campus this spring? You would think frisbee, right? That's what The Falcon would have you believe. However, most students are unaware that The Falcon makes its own news. When was the last time you saw people playing frisbee in the loop? Did you look very closely to see if you actually knew these people? I think not. And even if you did, did you go up and talk to them? Ha! Didn't think so. Well, assuming you even did speak with them (and I'm going way out on a limb here), did you try pulling off their hair, or tearing off their mask? I knew it! You're just accepting things the way they want you to.

     That's right, they have placed agents "in the field" that do what they want, so that they can have something to write about. In all honesty, the new rave sport this spring is walking. That's right, walking. What better thing to do with your time on a campus with so many hills? Especially now that the construction crews have strategically blocked off all major thoroughfares on campus, forcing students to walk further even if they don't want to.

     But what kind of a story would that make? "Walking in Style" or "Fast Scooting Walking Fun" would probably be pretty boring stories. So, the good people at The Falcon make their own news for the campus to get excited about. For example, pull out last weeks Falcon. See the story about spring intramurals in there? Now I know that intramurals may be fun, but when was the last time you saw a good fight at an intramural softball game? If the intramurals were at all as competitive as professional sports like The Falcon makes them out to be, there would be a minimum of one fight per week. Not only the lack of fights, but look at the lack of superstars? I mean, besides Derek Atterbury's fastball that, if it "hit somebody, they'd be in a coma," whose name do you know that's in intramural sports? I didn't think so.

     So, all you avid walkers out there, just because The Falcon doesn't think your story is worth the ink on their page, don't let that get you down. Keep on walking. But I guess you have to, don't you. Ashton doesn't exactly have escalator service.

      Skor