About how much would you say an elephant weighs?
What do you have in your pockets right now?
Piper on the ASSP elections.
What political leader do you most disrespect, and why?
Piper on Nintendo.
Piper2.mp3

Piper on Super Mario Bros 3.
Piper3.mp3

What’s the most shameful thing you have ever done that you will publicly admit to? (Contains nudity)
What is your favorite insult? (Contains racy language)
If there was one thing at SPU that you could smite with a mighty blow, what would it be?
Piper on being "Benevolent Overseer" of Emerson Hall.
Piper4.mp3

Piper sings "Saved by the Bell"
Piper on concert choir and David Anderson.
What would be an awful way to die?
What was your first pet as a child, and how did it die?
Do you regularly check yourself for odd mechanical implants?
What is your most unpleasant characteristic?
Piper5.mp3

If you could say one thing to the people that criticize your articles, what would it be?
What would someone have to give you to convince you to give up writing forever?
Piper on changes he would like to make to SPU policies.
Piper6.mp3

If you had to be locked in a room and listen to the same song for an entire year, which song would it be?
What is the worst thing about Gwinn right now?
Tell us something strange about your childhood.
Piper7.mp3

Special bonus edition track. We have Greg say a bunch of words so we can put words in his mouth if we want to.
Piper8.mp3